BONUS: My Very Honest SAHM Thoughts One Month In

On this episode, Nellie gives her very honest SAHM thoughts one month in.

Nellie shares her experiences as a stay-at-home parent and entrepreneur, discussing the challenges of juggling work and family responsibilities while maintaining work-life balance. She emphasizes the importance of energy and resilience, delegating tasks, setting boundaries, and taking breaks to avoid burnout. Also highlighting the role of trust and confidence in personal and professional growth, sharing their experience of increased productivity, creativity, and confidence after making an intentional decision to trust their intuition. She emphasizes that trust is a verb that can be developed through small, intuitive actions, leading to greater happiness, success, and overall well-being.

We will touch on: 

• Balancing work and family life as a stay-at-home mom.
• Honest thoughts on being a stay-at-home mom, including the challenges and joys of the role.
• Entrepreneurship, growth, and prioritizing self-care.
• Balancing motherhood and business goals with flexibility and self-care.
• Trusting oneself and building confidence through intuition and action.
• Trusting oneself yields confidence, which leads to various positive outcomes in life.

We would  LOVE  to have you in our [ f r e e ] networking group, Wealthy Mamas Helping Wealthy Mamas on Facebook. 

Transcript

Unknown: 1:22

I thought it was only fitting that you come for a walk with me at 923, in the evening. I'm in jeans. I'm not even really in technically, like walking shoes. They're more like fashion shoes. But I was worried, here's a car coming. I was worried if I put on, like, sweatpants and took off my shoes, that I'd be like, Yeah, forget it. I'm not gonna go get some steps in. And I felt like that's not what I needed. I wanted to get some steps in, and so I thought it was just perfect to hang out together and share my honest thoughts of being home with two children pretty much full time while I still build the wealthy mama movement, it is definitely not for the faint of heart, and equally, I did choose it, So I am very careful to be grateful for that and step into my responsibility of like, this is the path that I chose. It was not impulsive. There was a lot of discussion and weighing pros and cons. You know, especially, like, the biggest thing we were worried about was my mental health, and myself included, because that's a that's, it's a lot like, there's women that stay home, or men or anyone, and watch children all day, every day. It's a lot. It's a lot like, and I love kids, and it's just, it's a lot. There's no way around it. And then when you add in still, you know, continuing to operate a business, you know, that's a lot. But here are my honest thoughts. I have no notes, so we're just going to see what shows up. And I think that that's like the most authentic thing ever. Here are my first here's my first thought. It is a lot second thought, I love it, which is so wild to me, because I pushed the I can never be a stay at home mom. I pushed that away for so long, and so then I just took it off the table because I pushed it away. And so if you don't know, we made the decision back in, like, think it was like February, but we knew that we wanted to wait until beginning of summer. It just to give me a little bit of time. You know, it made most sense, because I was going to stay home with Emma because it didn't make sense to, like put her in daycare. She's getting much older. I have noticed my kids have become even more of velcro children now that I've been home like I left. Think it was a few days ago, I left for either a walk or an errand or something, and Emma had like a, like, a nervous breakdown. So since they're with me even more, they were already velcro children with their mom. But I have noticed, like they've been getting a little spoiled with with having my time, which rightfully so, like that was the whole goal. So I've had to be I've had to get creative with like, my life is different, and that was by design. It was by choice. So I do things at a very odd time, which has like walking at 930 at night. I've worked at midnight more nights than I can remember in the last month, but I have, like, so much time during the day that I can do whatever I need to do, whatever they need me to do. So I have a ton of flexibility, which I'm very grateful for. That was, like the goal. So I'm working definitely very small pockets of time, very strange pockets, like pockets of time as well. But I could honestly say, like, even from a business perspective and an overall like happiness perspective, June was like an explosive month for wealthy mama movement. And also June was just a really happy month for my family like, and I really do believe that they they connect like, I think my kids feel more regulated because they have more of me. And therefore I feel more regulated because I have more of them, and even my husband, I feel like I have more time with him in very interesting ways, even though he obviously is still working. And so I think that helped the business, because you. There's only one me. I'm in the business and I'm in the family, and so since I felt more happy, more content, more regulated, I just noticed, like I was just going for big things in my business, and like the only thing that really changed was being home with my kids. So I really do believe that they're very much connected. Everything else was pretty much the same. So it doesn't surprise me that June was a huge growth month in so many different ways, not just like quick growth, but like long term growth. We secured several sponsors, including a presenting sponsor, which we'll be announcing. We literally started moving and laying the groundwork for our digital magazine, our virtual event that's coming up, almost sold out all of our gala tables. And this is all organic, like we're not running ads at the very moment, because I'm just like, let's double down on who we're already connected to. Then we'll run ads. It just makes sense. And so it's just been huge. It's been so huge. We're just so dialed in, and things are moving so well, and it's so easy, and it doesn't need a lot of my time and attention, like it's it's really beautiful, to be honest, and I'm really grateful for that. Like the team, pretty much, you know, Sarah and em, they really run majority of the things, besides me getting on a training, which is very limited on purpose, so it's just exciting. So it feels like the sky is the limit when I have needed a break. Like I'm either over stimulated, I just enroll support. I've asked my mother in law to help me here and there. I've enrolled my husband, right? Like, I stay up a little bit later just to even, like, get a little bit of breathing time. I've let go of the house needing to be perfect, because when you're making so many meals in a day, like I have done dishes more than I have, and so long the house gets messy because kids are playing. And I think the driving force for me is there's so little and this is only going to happen once, right? Like, we're pretty sure we're done having kids. Like, I, I say that because you never, never say never, but like, we're 99.9% sure we're done having kids, and so I just find myself savoring all the moments so much more I find myself. I get emotional every time I talk about it, because this is just, this was the whole goal of having my own business. And I feel like I've really gotten back to my authentic self, like I'm doing giveaways, I'm sending Happy Mail, I'm working out more than I ever have. My my husband and I are having great conversations, like, I just feel really grounded and present. I'm doing my makeup more. I'm putting on cute clothes, like I just I I feel like me. I feel like me, and this is like the driving force for me at Wealthy mama movement, because I know what it feels like to not feel like me. Do Damn it. I know what it feels like to not feel like yourself, and how scary and isolating that can feel, and how confusing that can feel, and so I've just never been so sure of the direction that I'm heading, and so it just makes it so easy to ask for sponsorships. It makes it so easy to do live videos. It makes it so easy to follow up with people, because I'm not afraid of the No, because the yes is so worth the No, like the people that say no or not right now or don't respond and don't take any of it personally, because I'm just so focused on making sure that I'm available for those that need and want my time, My attention, my ideas, my feedback, my support, my love, etc. And so it like I just feel no I don't want to say I feel no fear, but I just feel so focused on the vision and Myron Golden's one of, like my favorite. Favorite beyond favorite thought leaders and sales trainers, whatever you want to say. And he says, vision is what you see when your eyes are closed. And that stuck with me, because when I do close my eyes, everything that I see is coming to life in front of me, and I don't feel scared about it. I feel really regulated. I feel really safe, even when there's challenges and obstacles and hiccups like I just find myself not spiraling. I find myself very again, just very grounded in the vision that, like I feel so solid, even in challenging times, even in obstacles, even in, you know, whatever it may be. And so I just think that there everything is just so connected. Like, if you were to ask me at Jan, like, January, 1 of this year, and you were to tell me, six months from now, you'll be home with both of your kids full time, your business will be pretty much running, I don't want to say without me, because I don't want to, like, like, I'm still very involved. But so much can run without me, and that's huge. So we're so ahead in different, you know, key ways, with the with the movement, that it's taken a lot of pressure off of me, right? We don't have an office space anymore like the team has been with me for so long that they know me, they know the brand, they know my voice, they they can repurpose content left and right. Like, you know, it's, it's huge. There's just been very strategic moves. But like, if you would have told, told me at the beginning of the year, like that, I'll be home with both kids by beginning of June, I would have been like, what? Like, there's no way. And like, that's the power in keeping an open mind. Like, because one day I was just sitting in the car pickup line saying, huh, I wonder if I could pull Boone out of daycare. Like it just randomly came to my mind, and then I just started thinking, and then I talked to my husband, and like everything is so connected, and when we stop pushing possibilities away, it allows us to really open ourselves to the possibility of anything like it really is so huge and so that is like our responsibility to just keep an open mind. Like what I told our students in a pep talk for the last half of the year is, yes, be so grounded in your vision of where you want to head, especially in these next six months, but be so flexible in how you get there, because it could happen in such a bizarre way that if we're so fixated on it has to be this way, we miss out on so many blessings, so many opportunities. I can't wait to see what possibilities happen, what opportunities happen in these next six months, I'm sure it's going to be wild, like and so cool and so divine. And I really do believe those things are always available to us when we open ourselves up to them, and so the more we take care of ourselves. I also think it helps with the regulation, it helps with the grounding. It helps with the energy, the stamina to keep moving forward, to be a mother in general, takes so much freaking energy. It takes so much stamina. And then you add on top of that, wanting to start or grow a business, and like, you have another baby. Like, no matter where you're at on your business journey, it's like another baby, like, truly. And sometimes it can feel like a twin or triplets, and you're like, trying to do all the things, right? And so like you being so grounded in who you are, your vision, your energy, your stamina, right? And this is not just a one and done type of thing, like this is constant, and it's never going to be perfect timing. Like I could have every excuse in the book to not, you know, go for walks, not go for a run, right? Like, whatever it may be. And I've just allowed myself to do it so messy and so imperfectly. I used to stress, even not too long ago, I used to stress about the. House so much I used to stress about laundry so much. I used to stress about so many things that just don't even matter. And I don't know what happened, but one day, I was just like, let me try a different way, right? Like, again, be open to the possibility, like, no one wins when I'm freaking out and stressing about laundry, like, like, it can wait. It can wait. And so I just really, I like, I've shifted my way of being, and it's shifted my whole reality because of it in the best way possible. And I do believe that's also a part of June being such an explosive month, I allowed myself to do it messy. I allowed myself to do it differently. I allowed myself to take it one day at a time, even like one hour at a time. I allowed myself to have tons of energy one day and, like, do a ton of stuff, and then the next day, if I didn't feel like it, I I did the bare minimum and felt no shame in it. Like even Saturday morning I had, I think this is so important to hear, like Saturday morning, for whatever reason I had the lowest energy that I've had in a really long time, and I just like I couldn't figure it out, and so I just gave myself permission to do the bare minimum, and I kept checking in with myself, checking in with myself. It didn't feel like I didn't feel like sad or anything. I just didn't have a ton of motivation, which is normally not like me. But I really think my body was just like, we need a break. Like, because when you're going all day every day, especially five days a week when, like, you're home alone with two kids, I think my brain and my body, finally, on Saturday morning we're like, oh, we can, like, we can rest, we can chill, like, can we please do that? And so I just loved myself, you know, like, I played with my kids and everything, but I just, I didn't overdo anything. And then it was so interesting to me, because in the afternoon, after I kind of like, veg out and chilled and relaxed. I got this burst of energy, and I dyed my hair, I created some content, and like, that's so me. Like that is so me. And so the fact that I didn't like shame myself around it is huge. Like, I still accomplish so much on a Saturday when, like, it's not expected, right? And so, like, taking the pressure off of myself is something that I've talked a lot about and lots of different videos. And so that's like a prime example in taking the pressure off of myself. Like, Sure, there's tons of things that I could have been doing or wanted to be doing, but like my body told me, No. So therefore I said, not right now, like, not right now. And wouldn't you know, it taking the pressure away, then I had all the energy later that day, that very day, the same day, to, like, you know, just crush it in so many ways and just do so many things that, like, I wanted to do, but I didn't force myself to do it. And so, like, that's why for me, schedule freedom is so dang powerful, because there is not a lot of money making opportunities that I am aware of, and I've been in this world for a very long time, that allow you to have that type of schedule freedom, where you have so much flexibility that you can actually go with your energy patterns, even if they're, you know, different, which I believe with children, they're going to be different, because your children are a part of your energy, and if they get a sleepless night, for the most part, you probably get a sleepless night, and that's not something that you can really predict. I mean, if you have a way, you let me know. But I've had sleep coaches for kids. I've done all the bells and whistles for routines. And they're, they're a human being, right? Like they're not going to have and a young human being at that like, so they're not going to have this super rigid, consistent sleep schedule, or be always happy, go lucky. I even remember one day Emma, she was like, I can't be happy all the time, Mommy. And I was like, I don't expect you to honey. And she goes, that would be exhausting. I was like, I get it. And so that was just like a humbling moment of like, okay, you know, allow. For a kid to have a breakdown, because I need a breakdown, right? Like, I need a breakdown at times. Look at this. Look how pretty that is. This is why I'm walking outside. It's the view, it's the time alone, it's all the things. And it feels like so cool and calm out and so peaceful, like it's so good, so good. So I am very happy, even though it's a crazy, messy life, it's very imperfect. One month in, I don't want to I'm not regretting my decision, and I think that that is a very powerful win. Because for sure, by now, I would have known if I made the quote unquote wrong decision. I won't say wrong decision, but I would like have regretted my decision. And equally, I know that this is also a season, just like anything, Emma will go back to school. She's a first grader. She'll go back to school mid August. We also head to the beach this month. This week's a little bit off because of the Fourth of July. There's lots going on with family and everything. So really, she has probably, like, six ish weeks left, and one of those weeks will be like full time family at the beach. So I also know, like those, these six weeks or so. I don't know if it's exactly six weeks, but it's about six weeks are going to go so fast, so fast, and so once she goes back to school. Like Boone, pretty much naps two to three hours during the day, like a solid nap on a good day, on a good day. So like, by the time I drop M off at school, we have like, five hours to play with, give or take, and then we're going and picking her back up at school. So if he sleeps for like, two to three hours, that really doesn't leave a ton of time by the time we, like, get back in the car, go pick her up, etc. And so I know we'll get into, like, a really solid routine, at least, I'm going to tell myself that at least we'll get in a it'll be a different routine, like we already have routines now. It's just kind of a little you know, every week is different. Summer, it's like, what's going on, all the things. But we'll get in a routine, a school routine, which I am looking forward to, but in closing to be so official in closing, I don't regret my decision. It's absolutely impacting me as a human positively. It's positively impacting my family, especially my children, and therefore, it's also impacting positively my business. So I think it was one of the best decisions that I've made and a really long time, emotionally, physically, financially, it is propelling me in the direction that I want to go and getting it's helping me get really scrappy and creative and very efficient, because that really is my only option. I don't have, you know, six to eight hours Monday through Friday at a desk, nor do I think I really want to anyways. So it's really helped me with my time management, and more than I ever have before. I'm creating content more than I ever have before. I am reaching out to people and following up with them faster than I ever had before. So like all in all, it was one of the best decisions that I've made, and I'm really glad that I trusted myself, and thankful and grateful that I trusted myself, and I feel really proud that it wasn't like an impulsive decision. It was very intentional. It's very well thought out. We talked about it as a family, and it's just I can't. I cannot wait to see where we go from here. And so maybe there's like a tug on your heart for something going on, right that little like tug, be open to the possibilities. There are so many blessings that want to come into your life right now when we don't push them away, right, like, when we don't lock the door, so at least be open to the possibility. We could have talked about it as a family. We could have weighed the pros and cons, and we could have, like, come to the conclusion that, like, okay, maybe it's not time, right? Maybe it's not time. You. And like, I came to my husband with an open mind, like, because I wanted to hear his feedback and ideas, and so it's just been beautiful to see it on the other side of what it's looked like, what it's felt like. You know, I didn't really know what it was going to look like or feel like. I just trusted myself. I trusted my intuitive nudge. I follow through. And every time, every time I've done that big and small, it's always provided, and maybe not always in the way that I thought, but I think there is nothing greater than trusting yourself, and I do believe that trust builds confidence, and confidence builds so many other things, and not just professionally, but like confidence is something that's really hard to fake long term. You can fake it for a little bit, but it's really hard to do long term. So when you actually put in the effort, put in the time, build the trust muscle, which then creates confidence, genuine, authentic confidence, like, there's nothing greater, like it yields so many other things. I do believe confident women, especially, they sell more, they give more, they love more, like, not always, but a lot of times. And I really do believe because it's directly connected to trust that you do give more because you trust that more money is coming your way. You do sell more because you trust that you're meant to reach out to that person. You're meant to do that offer, or that Facebook Live or whatever it may be, and you love more because you trust that you know it's you're meant to give your heart and and so many other things, and you're just happier like when you trust yourself. You don't feel this like unsettledness that is, like I felt that unsettledness, and it's, it's hard to describe it, but it really does feel like the like you're unsettled, like you're kind of antsy. And so when you can trust and be grounded and peaceful, it really is such a magnet for so many things. And you know, everyone has access to those things when you're willing to tap into them, although those lights are very bright, you're getting like the production vibe going on. Well, thank you. They stopped their lights. Okay, oh, they're backing up now. So and I do believe trust is a verb, like when you have an intuitive download as small as you know, what, I'm really craving a coffee, and you trust that, like that idea came to you, not randomly, but like you're really craving a cup of coffee, and you either go buy a cup of coffee, or you make a cup of coffee and then you enjoy said coffee. It's almost like a deposit into the Trust Bank, right? Like, I've had so many intuitive downloads of like, there's a Facebook Live that I need to do, there's a post that I need to do, and I follow through and I do it, and no matter the result of the post or the video, I feel this like sense of accomplishment when I did it, and that is what deposits into the Trust Bank. And so when you keep doing that, and keep doing that, the deposits start to compound. And I think that I believe, and I feel that that's what creates massive trust and massive confidence that leads to so much more, so much more. So listen to those nudges, listen to and be open to any and all possibilities. Because there are tons of ways to be happy, there are tons of ways to make money, there are tons of ways to be healthy, right, like I have even found, you know, not every day can I do five miles like I did yesterday. I ran five miles. I can't do that every day. I don't need to do that every day. So, like, okay, I can walk today. I can do lunges today. I can do squats today, right? Like, just allowing it to be what it what feels good is just so powerful. So thank you for coming to my TED talk. I love you so much. If there's anything I can do, let me know, I would love to learn more about you and your journey and your business and where you're at. So never hesitate to pop into my DMs and say, Hello, I'm in there quite a bit. So if. I would love to just chit chat and learn more about you. I.